How Not Be Condescending. When my brother and I were kids and asked my dad what he did at work, his answer was clear: “I count hamburgers.
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When my brother and I were kids and asked my dad what he did at work, his answer was clear: “I count hamburgers.”
My dad worked for McDonald’s for 30+ years and at that time, headed up the accounting department. His simple (yet accurate) answer made sense to my 7-year-old brain without making me feel stupid.
I often hear from people who are afraid to ask questions or get coaching from leaders or mentors because they’ve been made to feel stupid for asking questions (or seen it happen to others). Here are five things you can do to not be condescending when training a novice:
Go Back In Time
As we become more experienced, we take foundational concepts for granted. Before sitting down with a novice, take two minutes to consider what you knew at that point.
If you didn’t get good training or coaching at the time, what would have made it better? If you did, what did your leader or mentor do effectively? An answer to either question is a good starting point for you.
The key is to re-experience that novice mindset so you can be more empathetic with others.
Say Less, Not More
In one of my first jobs, one manager in our location liked to impress us with all the details. He was probably the smartest person in the place but a lousy leader since nobody ever wanted to get trained by him. He’d take so long telling you about the advanced details that you’d feel foolish asking something basic.
Many people get excited about sharing knowledge. The best leaders take the opposite approach and challenge themselves to train and coach with the least amount of extra information. They believe “less is more” and listen for evidence that the novice is ready for more.
Share Your Mistakes
What might seem to be a simple skill to you could be quite intimidating to someone else. The novice working with you only sees the results of your hard work, not how you got there.
Sharing your mistakes can be a powerful tool in training a novice. It helps the novice avoid the mistake themselves and lowers stress levels by making them realize that you weren’t perfect right away.
This approach also makes your training more efficient by getting to the point faster and avoiding unnecessary information sharing.
Run the 7-year-old test
If a 7-year-old were listening to you, would they understand the essence of your message?
This simple test can make a huge difference in how well a novice understands your training. If you get a positive result, you know you’re on the right track.
Assume Nothing
I sat down with a client years ago and started talking about how they could use SMART goals. Later in the conversation, she asked politely, “So, what are SMART goals again?” It dawned on me that I had assumed she knew something she didn’t – shame on me.
Assuming your training is adequate can lead to poor results and frustration for both you and the novice.
Here’s what you can do to fix this and become a better trainer:
- Ask more questions, such as “Have you ever heard of SMART goals?”
- Show interest in their knowledge and understanding of the topic.
- Clarify any doubts they may have.
By assuming nothing and being more open-minded, you’ll find that your training and mentoring improve significantly.
Which of the above would be most helpful in your training and mentoring right now?
Tell me in the comments below.
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